So You Want To Help

Want to help but don’t know how? 

Do you fear becoming overwhelmed with others problems?

Do you think you have to be super informed or educated to be able to help others?

Well that was what I thought before I became involved in helping people with Major Mental Illnesses.

After 20 years of supporting people, I have distilled my learning down to 5 basic things I think everyone should know.tightrope (1)

Originally I published this under the title ‘The Unguided Pastoral Missile’ but since then I have decided on a name change and I have added some really valuable information about Stress and how it affects one’s mental health.

Whenever I have shared this content it was like the room was lit up with light bulb moments going off.

So here is what is in the e-book.

Topics Covered

  • Pastoral Care – more than offering a scone
  • The Conscious and Disciplined use of the Self – being aware of what you bring into the caring situation.
  • Empowering the Other – discovering how transformation happens through empowering others. 10 ways in which Jesus empowered others.
  • Lines of Love and Respect – Boundaries but with a bit more depth
  • Problem Solving – a simple proven way in which we can help others to solve their problems.
  • Understanding Stress – checking out how stress and vulnerability affect our mental health and what can be done about it.

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Available in epub, Mobi (Kindle) and pdf

Pay what you like

Now available in print.

$5 plus post and package. Contact me and I will send you a copy!



5.0 out of 5 stars Insight pastors can’t afford to miss.

By Trevor H. Lund

I’m a big fan of Barry’s blog and knew the book was going to have a lot of great insight. He caught my attention with talking about pastoral care by writing:

“It will require being both the ambulance ‘Good Samaritan’ at the bottom of the cliff and a ‘fence enabler’ at the top. Let the latter be the preferred option.”

The man has experience and the wisdom that comes with it.

I’m getting back into full-time vocational ministry and this book was timely for me. It reminded me of things I can’t afford to forget about.

Thank you, Barry, for sharing your insight.

5.0 out of 5 stars Very practical and balanced approach to pastoral care

By Gary Corbett

This attractively presented book on caring for and supporting others is a useful and practical resource for individuals and for groups wanting to learn more about pastoral care. Barry’s style of writing is fresh, crisp and uncluttered. Each chapter has helpful information, questions and exercises to do. He has included some very practical resources such as a process for problem-solving and setting goals. I would highly recommend this book.

5.0 out of 5 stars An easy read to a more effective helping relationship November 5, 2013

By Carolyn

“In short, practical pages, enlivened by anecdote and observation, Barry offers five simple lessons to help us help others. Putting even half of what he offers into action will prevent me from being an ‘Unguided Pastoral Missile’, and by using all of it all the time, all of us can become much more effective in ministry. If there is a defect with this book it is that it is too short. There is far, far more that Barry could say, and one senses that these few chapters are a very small spill from his sack of wisdom. But the brevity of this work can only increase its effectiveness; no-one can say they lack the half hour it will take to engage with these insights.”

By Teresa Millan
‘So you want to help’ has been written in a very appetising style that doesn’t take long to read and learn very useful tips from. Some of these simply require a change of attitude to one that honours, empowers and validates the identity of the person receiving help in a way that I truly see as Kingdom culture.
I find this book truly life giving…and the great thing is that the advice given can be implemented practically immediately, without the fear of doing more harm than good!  @tmf33uk

Pay what you like